11 May 2008Greetings, Internet peasants —
My name is Natalie and this is my first time “blogging.” I used to think that the Internet was only for poor people who wanted to buy used designer shoes (ewww) but it turns out that this blogging thing is quite popular. I read a few and realized that it was time to step in. The problem with the Internet is that even stupid people are allowed to write blogs! Ugly people, too! There are no rules! So I decided that I needed to start a blog so that you Internet peasants could read the thoughts of an intelligent, sophisticated person. If you read my blog a lot and learn from me, you might become a better human being. Give it a try. You have nothing to lose . . . trust me.
13 May 2008Hello again.
I realized that you probably want to know a little about me. Of course, anyone with half a brain could look me up online and learn that:
1) I’m 11 years old
2) I live in London but travel loads
3) My parents are super rich and I know heaps of important people.
You can stop rolling your eyes. And don’t call me conceited. You’re just jealous. It’s not bragging if it’s true! At least that’s what my mum tells me. You can always stop reading if it bothers you, but I know you’ll be back. I’m having tea with Prince William and Prince Harry this afternoon, and I know you’ll want to hear all about it! Ta-ta!
14 May 2008Too full of delicious crumpets to write. The princes were just lovely. I think Harry might fancy me. I’m much prettier than that common girlfriend of his. She was wearing black trousers with brown shoes! Honestly . . . some people belong in a zoo.
22 May 2008Tomorrow, I’m going to a debating tournament in Edinburgh with my school’s debate team. I’m the best, naturally, but neither of my parents have seen me debate yet. They have very important jobs and are quite busy. My mum went to Sweden and Brazil last week! I bet that’s more than your mum has ever travelled! My mum and my dad are going to take our family’s jet to Edinburgh to see me tomorrow. I can’t wait to show them how easy it is for me to make the other debaters cry! They’re going to be very impressed.